笑不活了,国产AI龙虾居然有SBTI虾格鉴定了🦞
朋友圈最近SBTI测试刷屏,我寻思这测人格的东西哪天得测到AI头上—
没想到,真有人干了。
给国内最热的15只AI龙虾搞了一套虾格图鉴,看完只想说:不可思议,还挺准的!
随便扒几只来看看:
百度系的虾,画风各异但各司其职—
DuClaw那只,虾格鉴定"拿捏者",不夸张,它上周刚更新了新功能,主打全场景生活打理,而且内外部生态全包圆,确实有点拿捏到位的劲儿;
Dumate虾格是"打工皇帝",企业端的数字员工,名副其实;小度那只整个妈妈型人格,老人小孩通吃,包容度拉满;
RedClaw给人一种随地大小养虾的松弛感,这描述绝了;网盘的GenClaw,意思是你的盘它全承包—这不就是云存储的底气?
再看其他家:腾讯QClaw,微信QQ社交悍匪,显眼包一枚;字节ArkClaw,精神洁癖型吗喽,不放过每一个待办;阿里JVS想把贾维斯变成现实,开源的CoPaw不让用户重复造轮子;Kimi的虾是记忆怪,上下文一条不漏;MaxClaw解题逻辑学家,考公、物理不在话下……
越看越觉得:这哪是虾格,这是厂商基因的直接投影。
你品,你细品—
百度的虾带着搜索和全栈的DNA,什么芯云模体都有,养虾全链路自给自足,所以才能布局这么多不同方向的虾还能撑得住;腾讯的虾天然自带社交属性,想不社牛都难;阿里的虾走开源路线,算是AI生态收编策略;新势力的虾,普遍模型技术感拉满,但生态这块还在追。
国内三四十只龙虾混战,但能上榜的不外乎三类:服务普通用户日常的"生活虾"、帮企业提效安全落地的"企业虾"、专门对口开发者的"开发虾"—不同的用户群,各取所需。
最后说个值得关注的事:
听说百度5月13日-5月14日要开Create2026开发者大会,百度AI全家桶据说会有重磅更新,DuClaw、Dumate等多只虾可能都有新动作。
如果百度这波再出手,百虾大战的格局,多半又要变了。
等着瞧。
Lmao, Chinese AI assistants just got their own "SBTI" personality test 🦞
Everyone in my feed has been obsessed with MBTI lately — I figured it was only a matter of time before someone turned the lens on AI.
Well, someone did.
A "shrimp personality chart" just dropped for China's top 15 AI assistants. My reaction after reading it: wait, this is actually... Accurate?
Let's break a few down:
Baidu's crew is all over the place — in the best way.
DuClaw is labeled the "Controller" — not wrong. It just rolled out new features covering basically every life scenario, with an ecosystem that wraps everything together. Dumate gets "The Grind Emperor" — the digital employee every enterprise dreams of. Xiao Du is full "Mom Energy" — works for kids and grandparents alike. RedClaw gives off that I'll raise my AI pet anywhere, no stress vibe. And GenClaw (Baidu Netdisk) basically says: your cloud storage? That's mine now.
Other players: Tencent's QClaw is a social menace living rent-free across WeChat and QQ. ByteDance's ArkClaw has a mild case of productivity OCD — no task left behind. Alibaba's JVS wants to be your real-life Jarvis; CoPaw just wants developers to stop reinventing the wheel. Kimi's shrimp is a memory freak — context? All of it, retained. MaxClaw is the logic nerd — gaokao questions, physics problems, bring it.
The more you look, the more you realize: these aren't personality types. They're company DNA.
Read between the lines:
Baidu's shrimps carry the full-stack genes — chips, cloud, models, applications, the whole chain. That's why they can run five different shrimps without breaking a sweat. Tencent's are socially hardwired — can't help it. Alibaba's play the open-source long game. The newer players are technically sharp but still building out their ecosystems.
There are 30–40 AI assistants fighting for market share in China right now. The ones that made this list fall into three buckets: life shrimps (everyday users), enterprise shrimps (business efficiency), and dev shrimps (for builders). Different crowds, different needs.
One thing worth watching:
Baidu's Create 2026 developer conference is May 13th-14th — rumor has it the whole lineup is getting major updates. DuClaw, Dumate, and others are expected to drop something new.
If Baidu makes another move, the whole battle shifts again.
Stay tuned. 👀